Broken Heart

In my anger and fear I tried to put my broken heart back together by myself, but it looked so bad...too many pieces missing, to many broken dreams... "But how could you lose pieces of your heart?", you may ask. well, at first i was too hurt to admit it was broken. than i was too proud to confess my hurt. and as i continued my walk, pieces of my broken heart fell. i thought they were tears. but when i felt something was missing, it was too late. i already gave parts of my heart , even before it broke. i got them all back...i found one piece in the trash. apparently, the one i gave it too decided it's too ugly. i took it back, i needed it in my desperate try to put my heart back together. "You’re never too ugly for me", i said, and put it safe. Than, as i was walking, i found another piece. No one cared about that certain piece of my heart, so now it was just walking around, looking for some attention. "I'll never ignore you", i cried and picked it up, "i'll never act like i don't know you're there". I was happy...i thought that was all i lost, so now i was trying to do the puzzle. But...there still were pieces missing...so i continued my search, hoping i'll get it all back. Than, as i was walking, i saw a boy playing with a piece of my heart. "what are you doing? can't you see i need my heart back? give it back, i need it!". He looked at me and smiled. Than i understood why he was holding it. "good choice" i said to myself. But than i saw how he decided to break my heart even more than it already was. "you're a great girl", he said, "awesome friend, but i never really loved you anyway. Here, take it back, i don't need it anymore. See, i got another one. I found a girl that was willing to give me more". I took it back mad that i didn't know better. "it's ok, next time, i'll be more careful, i won't give you away to anyone. I'll think well before giving you away again", i said while trying to strengthen up my pieces with my tears...So i kept on walking. Than, when i stopped, i saw another piece of my heart. But it wasn't on fire, like when i gave it away. Now it was all burned out..."what happened?', i cried and ran to the place where what used to be my heart on fire was..."who are you? why did you put out the fire?", i asked the ones standing there, glad they did a good deed. "oh, is this yours? we saw it burning, and we were afraid it might spread to the other hearts around here. there's no danger now. see, it's not even warm anymore". I took what used to be my dreams, my hopes, my beliefs..."what will i do now? i'll never have the same passion again!"......and i cried. i stood there and cried. "where can i go? what can i do?"...and while my tears were falling, i noticed something...the road kept on going. This was not the end. " i have to see the end", i said while i got up and wiped away my tears. "there has to be something, someone to help me get my heart back". So i kept on walking. And than..all of the sudden, i saw it....The Book was there...a big, old dusty book... i read it. and, while reading, i heard a voice saying "i see you have a broken heart". "can you help?" i asked, desperate to end the pain. "yes, i can. but i need your trust. i need you to give it all to me, so i can put it all back together." I got sad, "can't you see it's broken? why do you want it now? it's all gone, all its beauty, all its strength...its all gone...no, i won't trust you...look what happened to my heart...i trusted too much, and that's what got it broken in the first place.". Quiet. No answer. Just a hammer and some nails...a cross..."wait...i think i saw you before...you wanted my heart when it was nice. what happened? how come you still want it now? no one wants a broken heart...". I looked at my heart...it was so different from what it used to be..."all in pieces, it will never look the same again...maybe He really wants my heart, no matter the shape. what do i have to lose anyway?", i said to myself..."here, you can have it. i don't care if you can fix it or not. take it. it's all yours. do whatever you want with it. it used to be so good to have it inside of me...it kept me warm, made me feel human. " He took it. It hurt giving it away. So i started to cry. It was hurting me to know that now i have no heart. I wished i could've start it all all over again...i wanted a second chance..."can you fix it?" i found myself asking. "yes". "but how? i tried to put it back together using my tears, but they weren't good enough. do you have some sort of special glue i should know about?"...no answer...just the nails and the hammer..."Here, it's ready. You can have it back." "Back? But i gave it to you! I only wanted to fix it. See, it's good as new". I looked at it. The glue...it was something new, something i've never seen before..."wait", i said while giving Him back my new heart, "i want you to have it. If you can fix it, i'm sure you can use it better than i did. But...can i stick around and see how You will use it?". I saw His hands while He reached out for my heart...they still had the sign of the nails..."Ask and you shall receive", He said, and we started to walk together, on a new road, with a new heart...